Lately, I’ve been hurt by some anonymous comments on this blog. Using a rapier wit that comes with anonymity, they have unleashed volleys of hard-hitting criticism on me and my totally hilarious writing.
So, due to their concerns about my mental health, I decided to take this week to reflect about my life and my legacy.
It’s the reflection that comes from meditating on the words and wisdom of those who follow the Art of douchebaggery.
For example, an anonymous fan of Tony Robbins came to my blog to criticize my negative review of Tony’s book.
I was just going to add him to my legion of hate mailers (mostly anonymous Tony Robbins fans and affirmation lovers), but he really hit home with this comment:
simple question for this reviewer: what have you created that has helped and benefited millions of people? what legacy will you leave behind besides being a critic? Tony Robbins and his approach is for those people who want to create and proactively participate with their lives – not spend the day criticizing the efforts of others.
Now, that just says it all, doesn’t it?
I never thought about my legacy until this brave soul posting anonymously brought it to my attention.
I guess I don’t have much right now to leave behind–except for a castle that I currently reside in, as well as my personal island.
I think I’ve been selfish to keep the castle to myself all this time and to not let anyone on the island. Well, to be honest people CAN come to my island but the DSP guards have shoot-to-kill orders.
So to preserve my legacy:
I’ll leave behind my castle and my personal island. When I die, I plan to have it converted into a self-help amusement park with fun rides such as the Cosmic Vibration-a-whirl, Ferris Wheel of Attraction, The Firewalk of Hope, the Sweat Lodge of Mirrors, and more.
Fun for the whole family!!!
I would do it while I’m alive but I wouldn’t want those darn critics criticizing me for the shameless self-promotion it takes getting people to come to the amusement park or for all the money I’m (rightfully) making all in the name of helping people. Of course, those critics are nothing but jealous people who don’t do SQUAT to help others. They just run off at the mouth criticizing the good work of others. So what if it costs $5,000 to enter the park? So what if I rip people off because they’re too stupid to see what I’m doing? I’m doing them a favor taking their money! So what if my rides cost $500 to ride (a bargain!). So what if the Sweat Lodge of Mirrors has been known to cause death!
If they don’t like it, those lame-o critics should make their own damn amusement park and stop criticizing mine. Go make a critic amusement park or something. I’m sure you and your critic friends (all 2 of them) will have a ball.
But honestly life’s too short to deal with those dream-stealing critics. For now, I’ll enjoy my life. The Self-help Amusement Park will be my legacy. What will be yours? Being a critic? Yeah, right.
I’d like to thank the anonymous fan of Tony Robbins for showing me the error of my ways and driving me to make some positive change.
Post Script: Readers should know that the self-help amusement park will open AFTER my death. Do not come to my island or my castle. The shoot-to-kill orders are still on effect and my castle has full medieval defenses.
Photo by Miguel Allue Aguilar