Wow. She’ll tell us how she lost all that weight (surgery, probably…I mean, special diet plan). I’m so pumped. And you know I’ll be pre-ordering it..NOT.
Janet Jackson? Self-help? Seriously?
I think, if anything, Janet needs to read one or two (she probably did read some…the bad ones).
But that got me thinking…what about all those celebrities who’ve written self-help books. What are they like? Why should anyone read them?
DSP takes a closer look at the celebrity self-help books we won’t be reading:
1. Mike Sorrentino
Here’s The Situation: A Guide to Ripped Abs, Grooming, and How to Keep Up With Your GTL
I have no idea who this guy is, but it looks like he’s writing a book. I won’t buy it. He looks like a douche.
2. Tyra Banks
Tyra’s Beauty Inside and Out.
A supermodel wants to tell me about being beautiful?
3. Jennifer Love Hewitt
The Day I Shot Cupid: Hello, My Name Is Jennifer Love Hewitt and I’m a Love-aholic
I love Jennifer Love Hewitt. I don’t know why. It’s just one of those things. Maybe it’s the way the camera constantly focuses on her boobs on Ghost Whisperer (watch an episode; you’ll know what I mean). But I just can’t see myself taking relationship advice from her.
4. Suzanne Somers
Knockout: Interviews With Doctors Who are Curing Cancer and How to Prevent Getting It in the First Place
One review from Amazon really summed this book up for me:
“My mother read this book, and believed in it. Right up until she died of cancer. “
5. Whoopi Goldberg
Whoopi’s Big Book of Manners
Does this include walking away from people who say things you don’t like?
6. Shirley Maclaine
Sage-ing While Age-ing
Not sure if Shirley Maclaine wrote this book or if her alien friends whispered it to her.
7. Jessica Simpson
I Do: Achieving Your Dream Wedding
I guess she’ll get a do-over on that one.
8. Lynne Spears (mother of Brittany)
Through the Storm
Seriously, Are you going to take parenting advice from Lynn Spears?
Looks like another attempt of a celebrity parent to make money off their kid. Sad.
As a bonus: here is one celebrity self-help book I might read:
Coem on. It’s 50 Cent! You know it’s gonna be AWESOME!!!!