5 Real Jobs That Sound Like Jokes

March 3rd, 2010

I once played a game with a friend when we tried to think of the dumbest jobs or business idea.  We had a good laugh. Then, I went to Google.  I am still stunned that some of these jobs/businesses even exist.

Seems like you can be just about anything as long as you are seen as trying to “help” people.  So, I listed 5 jobs that sound like jokes and as a bonus wrote some ad copy for them.

1. Life Awareness Coach: I will coach you to see that you are actually alive and not dead.  I accept vampires, zombies, and people who have at any time sold Amway products.

2. Tarot Business Advisor : Let me use the power of the tarot to guide your business and take it to the next level..here is Death, the card of changes…I see many changes on the horizon…you are unsatisfied with your life…there was a talent hidden you had when you were a child that you are now thinking of…perhaps in was in the creative field..like writing or art…I see an accident involving water…yes, it’s clear now…your business will lose some money.

3. Pet psychologist: Your dog isn’t biting the mailman because he’s a mean bastard, but because he’s got repressed feelings of abandonment from being separated from his mother at an early age.  He also has slight ADD.  His lack of eating shows your dog is suffering from anorexia.  Also, there is a chance that your dog has bulimia, since you often catch him regurgitating after eating grass.

4. Astrological Marriage Counselor: As a Virgo with Saturn rising, you are vulnerable in the fact that you can be too strong for your partner, who can find your inner strength too much to handle, but sometimes you opt for personal comfort rather than bringing the relationship to a close.  In this, I see less of Saturn’s influence than that of Mercury’s. You need to align your Mercurial influence with that of your partner whose first house is Mercury.  Only then, will you find balance and contentment.

5. Psychic Energy Reader: Hmmm…you look a little tired today. I’m sensing that you may not have gotten enough sleep last night.  That’ll be $150! 


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